Commitment issues??

Well here I am at midnight,can’t sleep feeling so lonely from within..I just want to feel loved…

So its been two years since I was in a relationship and right now I am scared to go back into the relationship “water”. I am hurting deep inside really bad but I really don’t feel it if I occupy my mind.
I am so SCARED of relationships. It’s really bad,I get a “proposal” (will you go out with me kind) and I just can’t bring myself to say yes.I am not even thinking about the proposal. I am tired of jumping from one relationship to the other. I am close to tears..
Really trying my best to move on but it’s hard..I am not thinking about my ex(tho he has moved on) or any ex bfre him but I just hurt real deep..

I really hope I get over this instantly before I drive away the ones that love me.

(Cloudy eyes can’t proof read.) 😦 😦 😦

Seems I have commitment issues..Do I have it??

Time to let the wall down???

Agree or Disagree with the picture ??

Okay!so here I am this quiet night silently cursing nepa for being the bastards that they are. So I had decided to give myself a break from relationships due to a nasty breakup in 2012.I said no more relationships because I felt I need a fresh start,drop the baggages.
So I am chilling on my own,enjoying the single life and boom!they invade my space. First is a really nice boy whose family I love gaan.I like him tho but will it last if we end up going out??Oh and he has proposed to me twice..Lool!!he makes me laugh mehn.
Secondly is the childhood crush that suddenly realizes that the attention has stopped coming. Oh i was ignoring her when she did everything for me and paid attention to me. Oh and he decides to send a “drunk”message saying he loves and misses me..(Joke of the century).His ship has sailed sadly.
Thirdly is this Delta boy that an ex-friend boyfriend introduced to me.. Omg!!the attention he gives me ehn,he is just responsible and hardworking..Asked me out during one of our conversations but I said “errmmm I will think about it”.
Fourthly is this CUTE boy that I sincerely don’t know his motives.He says he likes me and I just don’t know atall.
So the “Problem ” now is that should I let down the wall??I am enjoying my single life.I have decided not to settle for less anymore,I deserve the best.I want a tangible relationship something that might errmmm possibly lead to marriage.*covers face*.

I believe I am not being selfish..

Oh btw,It’s my mama’s birthday…whoop!whoop!!I love that woman.. 😀

Your happiness or a screwed marriage???

So once again I am watching the five year engagement and seeing all the postponing nd all I just laugh..Sincerely I think marriage is simply overrated. if you really wanna marry,you should consider your happiness in the long run. Why get engaged if you are not sure.yes I know it will b embarrassing for the guy if you say no especially if it is a public proposal. If you are not sure,simply discuss it with himso you don’t end Up like the five year engagement couple.
If you have to be a single mother before you find your “happy” man then go for it. If you are gonna clock 40 before you find your “happy” man then no problem but what I want everyone to know is that please take your time before you decide on marriage.consider yourself first before you consider the dude.Yes!it is selfish but your mind and happiness matters.
And in that note,please there is no such thing as a PERFECT man/woman. Kindly kill all those Disney fairytales nd all. Just be happy.

#my two cents.
Love y’all.

The Standby Girl

Well I know we’ve all had the experience of being a standby girl. We fall for that one guy who is fine,makes us laugh,he is a good cook and next thing we are already imagining ourself and the boy going out and all. Then the boy says oh “I am not looking for a relationship atm” and we sit nd convince ourselves that oh well I will give him time. With me being around and all he will change his mind.I will win him over. this goes on and on until he drops a bomb saying “oh!there is this girl I am interested in,could you check her out for me”…*jaws dropping*. You try to change his mind but noway your prince charming is hooked. Well it will take you a while to get over it because you realized you’ve always been the ” standby girl “…. Hurts so bad ehn…

Sometimes we are the cause of our own heartbreak..it sucks ehn..girls we can let our imaginations run wild ehn..
*A quick prayer for us all*

Anyways,Anyone with such experience give us details below..

Goals – Are you There Yet??

Lately i have been feeling down so this morning on my way to work in traffic, enjoying the ac i finally fixed *silently screams hallelujah*, i decided to go over my goals and thankfully i had such wonderful checklist at the beginning and now going down the list my smile turned into a concern i have two major goals and it seems it is taking forever to achieve them. It is a worry because i have three- four years to achieve these great goals.

Having goals makes you feel accomplished and there is this proud feeling when you achieve anyone on your list. Most times when i achieve one of my goals, my target is to stuff myself with food *covers face* i LOVE food ehn… *burps*. It gives me so much joy ehn.. Anyways what are your goals?or don’t you have? Do you go through your goals once in a while to see what you have achieved? Do you treat yourself? Do you feel you have achieved some of your goals?

If you know anyone who doesn’t have goals, encourage them to have goals.

*mwah*

Behind That Faux “mask”

I stand to be corrected but we all have a mask we hide behind. Some use theirs and some don’t. What i am trying to say is that if you feel good with that “mask” good for you but if you are showing that mask so everyone could like you then you are just gonna die within.

Why can’t people just be satisfied with the way they are? i simply don’t get why you have to present a fake self. i know we all have things about yourself we don’t like but no one is saying you shouldn’t change, change to please yourself and not the whole world. i sincerely feel peeps who go around carrying the faux personality are being deprived of self love. Learn to love yourself.

Yes the world is mean, we will always have people who will try to bring you down,make you feel like trash, like a nobody infact some will hate you and they haven’t met you. Don’t let all these get to you, learn to LOVE yourself and you will have peace within and you will be happy..

#mytwocents

Why “Palasa” Boys

Hello,

So here i am going through BellaNaija weddings due to lack of no work (Office is boring today),so i am going through every wedding post and reading every detail seriously and here comes the question “how come i don’t seem to attract the serious, committed guys,why the palasa boys?” i am guessing this question has gone through your mind alot of times.

I mean you are beautiful, smart, well-behaved, principled, determined,independent,not into the “runs” business, should i go on? but you just don’t seem to attract the serious minded ones. i am thinking maybe because i still have this small statue mehn you will see me and think i am between the ages of 16-18,blame the physique. The funny thing is that you go into a relationship with someone who looks like he has the potential of being serious, you put your energy,time, love and money included(don’t get me wrong, spending on your boyfriend is not wrong) and down the line Mr decided to misbehave or says you intimidate him. LOL!!

But seriously how does one bag the “serious-minded, ready to commit men”?because trust me it is becoming a bore. Okay! imagine this scenario yeah, you already have a list of the kind of man you want after meeting too many palasa boys. you go out looking all pretty,no makeup naturally you are beautiful and mehn the dudes that keep approaching you are the palasa boys COM’ON!!!!!

This kind of things makes you doubt your beauty mehn and BellaNaija is adding to this this morning.

Once again i will ask, “How does a girl bag a serious-minded,ready to commit man?”

If you have the answer, Holla!.

Hurt You

Okay Here i am listening to “Hurt you by Toni Braxton and Babyface” and i must say this song is deep. Decided to download their “love, marriage& divorce” album and trust me it is a lovely album. Anyways back to the main issue a particular line “loving you caused me so much” in this song just made me think of all my relationships. We’ve all been in relationships where we gave it all and we were mightily screwed over.  After been in bad relationship, you say no more but then and again you find yourself “falling” for another boy and he or you guys screw the relationship. Breakups are a terrible cycle(don’t even know if this sounds correct).

Simply writing this because my childhood crush, yes!childhood crush screwed me over. It is amazing how you’ve liked someone from your childhood days, you guys go different ways, you meet each other again and the feelings burst out once again. Fine things are going you are like “won’t be a bad idea if we go into a relationship” and he says ” Don’t let us define this”. In my mind, i go probably as a result of bad relationship,so i’ll just give him time. a year goes on and you guys still haven’t defined it and you basically know there is this crazy feeling and you are simply ignoring other boys cos you are like we will eventually go out. The thing boys just don’t know is that a girl can wait and do things for you but one day it will all come to an end (and viceversa) Well eventually this crush (possibly love) came to an end when he tried to change me. Mehn i simply drew the line.

Being single right now is like my best option, i have so much to do, goals to achieve and fresh boys to meet and flirt with(not dating). Loneliness comes with the single life. Loneliness is like a leech, it sucks on you.

Well i am just saying being single is my own solution to the breakup cycle. They kuku say “one man’s meat is another man poison”.

What works best for you?

Mwah!